Being a Husband and Father
I don't blog here (or anywhere) as often as my wife does, however I feel compelled to share some thoughts and show off our newly designed family website. First I'd like to say that I really enjoy being a husband and father, which is a good thing. The bible is clear that both things are good things. Proverbs 18:22 says "He that finds a wife finds a good thing and obtains favor from the LORD." Taking a a look back on my limited experience of being a husband, I can say that this is very true! I've found not only a good thing, but a great thing in my wife. She is the most loving and wife that I could have asked for, she is truly a gift from the Lord. I'm pretty sure that if I would have asked the Lord "hey Lord, here's a list of the qualities I want in a wife, please make it happen", that I would have been SORELY mistaken in my list, why you ask, because in my heart of hearts, that list would have been compiled with selfish wants. But since God is so gracious with me, he gave me the perfect wife. We will celebrate our 2 year anniversary in a about 5 and a half weeks, and I hope we get to celebrate 200 more! (though this is highly unrealistic since it is scientifically impossible for humans to live that long) Though being a husband is great and having a wife is great it doesn't come without it's challenges. Being a husband is hard work, sometimes I feel the weight of it on my shoulders, I feel that I haven't been able to provide all that's needed, whether that be financially, or otherwise. But in those times I'm reminded that I am not my wife's God and she is not my God, because it sure is exhausting trying to play God and satisfy our deepest longings. Here's a good quote about marriage from John Piper's Momentary Marriage
“Marriage is not mainly about prospering economically; it is mainly about displaying the covenant-keeping love between Christ and his church. Knowing Christ is more important than making a living. Treasuring Christ is more important than bearing children. Being united to Christ by faith is a greater source of material success than perfect sex and double-income prosperity. So it is with marriage. It is a momentary gift. It may last a lifetime, or it may be snatched away on the honeymoon. Either way, it is short. It may have many bright days, or it may be covered with clouds. If we make secondary things primary, we will be embittered at the sorrows we must face. But if we set our face to make of marriage mainly what God designed it to be, no sorrows and no calamities can stand in our way. Every one of them will be, not an obstacle to success, but a way to succeed. The beauty of the covenant-keeping love between Christ and his church shines brightest when nothing but Christ can sustain it.”
I couldn't have articulated it better if I tried. Thanks for that JP!
The second thing I'd like to talk about is being a dad. Also a really great thing, and also a really challenging thing. My sweet baby girl Aly is 8 months old and it feels like she won't stop growing, every time I turn around she's learned how to do something new. I feel like one night I am going to go to bed and the next morning I'm going to be getting up getting ready to drive her to college and asking myself where did all those years go. When that day does come, I don't want that question to be filled with regret, the regret of years gone by and wasted. Being a dad is challenging in the sense that it's sometimes really difficult for me to spend quality time with my daughter if I'm not intentional about it. So I try my best to carve out time to spend with Aly, whether that's reading a book, taking a stroll around the neighborhood, bathing her, or even changing smelly diapers. These are all things that bring such joy to my heart and I'm sure she appreciates it a well. Last night she woke up around 2AM (we thing she's teething, though I'm sure my wife will elaborate more on this), we let her cry a bit to see if she would soothe herself and fall back asleep, which didn't happen. Normally Brooke would get up and try to calm her down, but instead I decided to get out of bed and pick up my daughter and spend some time with her and try to calm her down, which I eventually did. We came out into the dark living room, only dimly lit by the flashing lights of our cable modem and she eventually calmed down and put her head on my shoulder. These are memories that I will never forget.